My daughter and I were shopping yesterday for a get well present. A little boy in her class had a good fight with the gym wall. The poor little guy was running in the game of "freeze tag" and apparently wasn't watching where he was going. (Although, it makes perfect sense when you are playing tag to keep your eyes fixed on your pursuer!) He hit the handle to the door on the wall and ended up with a concussion and 35 stitches!! Ugh! That wall bit him right down to the muscle! Okay, too much information, I know. His mom said that she could see the...okay, I'll stop.
Anyway, we were trying to find the perfect stuffed animal for him to cuddle with. As we were on the toy aisle my daughter said, "Let's get him this little bear and me the other one." "Wait a minute," I said, "We aren't shopping for you, remember??" "But mom!" This conversation sound familiar to anyone???
Similar selfishness seems to crop up in my son too. If you want to get a rise out of my son, try doing one of two things: Help him when he doesn't ask for it or try to eat one of his fruit snacks. My son has an amazing ability to swat my hand away while still trying to do whatever it is he is doing with his other hand without skipping a beat. He can swat my hand away while trying to buckle his own seat belt, while trying to turn on the computer by himself or while trying to turn on a DVD by himself. His ability to swat and still concentrate is almost worthy of the show, America's Got Talent! His eyes don't even seem to move away from what he is doing! And the fruit snacks...he guards those with hands, arms and head if need be. He can spot my fingers coming from a quarter mile! "MINE!" he yells. It is funny because he is always thinking of his sister whenever he does a craft or wins a prize, but when it comes to fruit snacks, ME is all he thinks about.
Now then, what about me? I wish that I could say that I have outgrown any selfish behavior. Nope. The good old flesh never seems to "outgrow" self, "What I will wear and what will so-and-so think about it. How does my hair look? How big is my house? What about my car, does it make me feel proud to drive it? Where's my bonus? Where's my gift? Where's my invitation to the party? What about me, God, where's my miracle?" I could go on and on and give you plenty of examples from my own life!! How selfish I can be! I read Philippians 3:3 this week which in the amplified bible reads, "For we [Christians] are the true circumcision, who worship God in spirit and by the Spirit of God and exult and glory and pride ourselves in Jesus Christ, and put NO CONFIDENCE or DEPENDENCE [on what we are] in the flesh and on outward privileges and physical advantages and external appearances."
Oh yeah, put NO confidence in the flesh. That means I can't rely on my looks, my gifts, my money or my position to make me a whole person! We are to pride ourselves in Jesus Christ and who He is. When our value system starts and ends with Him we will find ourselves more fulfilled and I dare say more blessed than if we seek all of the blessings as an end in and of themselves!! I was so challenged as I began to search my heart for the things that made me feel confident!! I could not say with all assurance that it was only Jesus that made me confident. I have put confidence in fitness for years. I have always tried to be thin. Now if I were to put all my eggs in this basket, what happens if I happen to get fat? (Okay, humor me on this one those of you who are rolling your eyes!!!) My whole value system, if it was based on my thinness, would crumble! I would live in fear and depression because what I put my confidence in failed! My body is going to change. I'm not going to (and don't) have the metabolism of a 20 year old for the rest of my life. Our bodies change, that's life. But when we PUT OUR CONFIDENCE IN CHRIST we can be assured that he will never change or let us down! Praise God. He wants me to see myself as He created me. Beautiful from the inside out. He doesn't love me for my size or complexion like the world does!!
I have prayed that God would reveal to me areas where I have allowed a lie of the world to become a truth in my heart! I am thankful that God hears us when we pray and is there to walk with us as we ask Him to sanctify us!
I was challenged and encouraged this week as I spoke with someone about a bible study. She was struggling with some of the content and it was a challenge even to make it to the bible study because her daughter would not stay in the nursery. She did not want to go to the study because it was going to take a lot of effort and wasn't paying a lot of dividends. We chatted about how, as Christians we need to make sure that we are taking everything that we read and holding next to God's word to make sure that it lines up. We need to know that what we are believing is scriptural!! I was proud of her for being sensitive to the Holy Spirit and encouraged her not to ever quit being sensitive when things don't quite match what God's word says.
A little while later I got a call from her and she was crying. A lady in the bible study was going through a hard time. She had always been a bit abrasive but for some reason just loved my friend's daughter. Because my friend's daughter was always with her in bible study, this lady sort of softened a bit to my friend. The lady shared her struggle about her unfaithful spouse and my friend was able to be Jesus to her by throwing her arms around this lady's neck and telling her that SHE loved her and would pray for her. My friend told me that she did not really know this lady but she KNEW that being at bible study wasn't, as she had assumed, always about her, her, her! God was using her and her daughter to minister to SOMEONE ELSE! It isn't always about us and what we are or aren't getting out of life! AND, ministry to others is hardly ever easy or convenient!!
Oh Lord, Help us to put our confidence in You. Help us to seek You and allow You to shed Your light on our dark places. Change us from the inside out! Use us right where we are as we are sensitive to You. Fill us with more of You and Your love as we daily draw near and help us to turn that love outward to others instead of keeping it all to ourselves. Purify our desires and help us to surrender our wills, may we truly live out, "not my will but YOURS be done!" Amen!
Friday, March 23, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Stress, Seriousness and Sunshine
I can't believe that it has been over a month since my last post. Busyness seems to be the adjective that I use, the excuse that I offer and the answer that I give. Then I look at my bookshelf and I see books like, "Too Busy Not to Pray" and "Weary Warriors and Fainting Saints" oh good grief, where to start?? I was thinking this morning as I was driving about trying to get up early in the morning. It seems like no matter what I do, my eyes want to slam shut and why is it that your bed is never as cozy as when you are suppose to be out of it???!!! I found myself crying out to the Lord on the way to drop my daughter to school, "Forgive me, Lord for my apathy."
I have looked at my life and my schedule over the last couple days. It is so important that we learn balance in our lives. I took my kids to the park yesterday (Hallelujah, the sun actually does come out once in a while in Chicago!!) and my daughter wanted to pretend that the see-saw was a balance beam. She told me, "Mom, it is so easy when you put your hands out like this." She stretched her arms out to the side and confidently walked the line in front of her. Are you getting the spiritual picture?? A scripture that has been on the forefront of my mind of late is Colossians 2:6, "Just as you received Jesus as lord, continue to live in Him." I don't remember coming to the Lord, clinging to my old life, or hanging on to someone or something. I remember the moments of surrender and breakthrough where I threw out my arms and said, "Here I am Lord, I surrender." So, as time goes on at least in my life, I have grabbed on to a few things and I am trying to walk the path of life with a pile of stuff throwing me off and blocking my view. We were saved by grace and that is how we are to live.
I have asked the Lord and mulled over this "walking by grace" a lot over the past couple weeks. I don't like living with a heavy heart or with a nagging frustration like a cough that never quite goes away. How does the "grace walk" look? A lot like my daughter on her balance beam. Arms out, head held high and confident smile. As I was doing dishes on Sunday, I began to weep before the Lord while I told Him that I feel like my grace walk lasts about 3 minutes and then I try and pick up a load. I told Him how frustrated I get that I can't seem to get it right for very long at a time. This is where the keeping on comes in. If we taught our kids just to throw in the towel when they fell off their bikes, there would be a lot of dusty bikes in garages. Just as we received, CONTINUE!!! Paul follows this with saying that we should be "rooted and built up and strengthened in the faith and overflowing with thankfulness" (Colossians 2:7). My prayer these days is root me God, build me up IN YOU.
My daughter made a type of Chia Pet at school with a clear cup and grass seed. She named him Hairy. Hairy grows so quickly. It is neat to look through the cup and see the roots stretching down. I have done some heart checking and I believe that sometimes struggle is the result of planting our little selves in something other than the Lord. My own abilities and my own limited perspectives are often the soil of my actions. Paul goes on to tell us in verse 9 that, "We have been given fullness in Christ." I don't want emptiness, in fact I don't even want half-fullness. I want overflow and abundance and that only comes from ROOTING, SETTLING IN, in CHRIST. He is where I fix my thoughts. He is where I leave my circumstances.
Today is Yellow Day for my daughter's Kindergarten class. We went to Target and bought a yellow shirt for her and a cute yellow flower headband. While I was brushing her teeth this morning, she asked me, "Mom, do you know what this shirt reminds me of?" "What," I asked. "Hope!" she proclaimed. "This shirt reminds me that we have hope in Jesus." No joke. My daughter is really more spiritually mature than a lot of adults I know. I'm not trying to brag, it is the reality though. If more of us adults put on our yellow shirts and thought about the hope we have in Jesus instead of putting on our impressive duds that make us feel better about ourselves, the world would seem to be a bit brighter.
Lord, thank you that you never give up on me. Thank you for the sunshine that you have given me through my family. (My youngest ray of sunshine is hanging on my neck!!) Thank you for my daughter, Lord, who reminds me to keep this life in perspective and to walk on, arms outstretched, confident in Almighty God.
I have looked at my life and my schedule over the last couple days. It is so important that we learn balance in our lives. I took my kids to the park yesterday (Hallelujah, the sun actually does come out once in a while in Chicago!!) and my daughter wanted to pretend that the see-saw was a balance beam. She told me, "Mom, it is so easy when you put your hands out like this." She stretched her arms out to the side and confidently walked the line in front of her. Are you getting the spiritual picture?? A scripture that has been on the forefront of my mind of late is Colossians 2:6, "Just as you received Jesus as lord, continue to live in Him." I don't remember coming to the Lord, clinging to my old life, or hanging on to someone or something. I remember the moments of surrender and breakthrough where I threw out my arms and said, "Here I am Lord, I surrender." So, as time goes on at least in my life, I have grabbed on to a few things and I am trying to walk the path of life with a pile of stuff throwing me off and blocking my view. We were saved by grace and that is how we are to live.
I have asked the Lord and mulled over this "walking by grace" a lot over the past couple weeks. I don't like living with a heavy heart or with a nagging frustration like a cough that never quite goes away. How does the "grace walk" look? A lot like my daughter on her balance beam. Arms out, head held high and confident smile. As I was doing dishes on Sunday, I began to weep before the Lord while I told Him that I feel like my grace walk lasts about 3 minutes and then I try and pick up a load. I told Him how frustrated I get that I can't seem to get it right for very long at a time. This is where the keeping on comes in. If we taught our kids just to throw in the towel when they fell off their bikes, there would be a lot of dusty bikes in garages. Just as we received, CONTINUE!!! Paul follows this with saying that we should be "rooted and built up and strengthened in the faith and overflowing with thankfulness" (Colossians 2:7). My prayer these days is root me God, build me up IN YOU.
My daughter made a type of Chia Pet at school with a clear cup and grass seed. She named him Hairy. Hairy grows so quickly. It is neat to look through the cup and see the roots stretching down. I have done some heart checking and I believe that sometimes struggle is the result of planting our little selves in something other than the Lord. My own abilities and my own limited perspectives are often the soil of my actions. Paul goes on to tell us in verse 9 that, "We have been given fullness in Christ." I don't want emptiness, in fact I don't even want half-fullness. I want overflow and abundance and that only comes from ROOTING, SETTLING IN, in CHRIST. He is where I fix my thoughts. He is where I leave my circumstances.
Today is Yellow Day for my daughter's Kindergarten class. We went to Target and bought a yellow shirt for her and a cute yellow flower headband. While I was brushing her teeth this morning, she asked me, "Mom, do you know what this shirt reminds me of?" "What," I asked. "Hope!" she proclaimed. "This shirt reminds me that we have hope in Jesus." No joke. My daughter is really more spiritually mature than a lot of adults I know. I'm not trying to brag, it is the reality though. If more of us adults put on our yellow shirts and thought about the hope we have in Jesus instead of putting on our impressive duds that make us feel better about ourselves, the world would seem to be a bit brighter.
Lord, thank you that you never give up on me. Thank you for the sunshine that you have given me through my family. (My youngest ray of sunshine is hanging on my neck!!) Thank you for my daughter, Lord, who reminds me to keep this life in perspective and to walk on, arms outstretched, confident in Almighty God.
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