We just got home from spending some time with a group of friends from church. We ate some great food, we laughed, the kids ate mostly cookies and pop and fought with each other. We came home and my husband and the kids are out enjoying the sunshine. I can hear my daughter crying in frustration about her bike riding. My son is far too big for the bike he has. I just watched him do a somersault in the yard with his bike helmet on. His knees are probably sore from the few short moments of trying to ride his bike. I have a new respect for the patience of my husband.
I am in my house looking at piles of this and that. Moving is never fun or easy or organized for me. I am overwhelmed and excited all at the same time. We are finally purchasing our first real home after 10 years of marriage. God has blessed us beyond measure again and again. We are so grateful. I look down at my bulging tummy and wonder why me. Why would God bless me. A broken mom who sometimes gets it right. A mom with two healthy, beautiful children and a loving husband and another blessing ready to come in August. I can't quite fathom God's goodness here, that is for sure.
The upcoming days will be filled with excitement and anticipation. I can't help but think of the challenges that lay ahead as well. Piles of boxes, sleepless nights, tests of whether or not I will finally be able to nurse and other adjustments. Will I be able to relax and enjoy the tender moments or will allow the moments to rush by covered in a pile of anxiety.
My prayer these days has been that God would empower this coward. I want Him to be my passion as I pursue the task of mothering like never before. I never thought of praying that God would equip me for the day to day stuff. I mostly depended upon Him for the monumental things. I would pray over situations during my day but never before set my face towards the heavens and cried out for daily power in my walk as a mother. Not as a woman, not as a pastor's wife but as a mom. I don't want to be a super mom I want to be a powerful mom. A mom that people look at and see Jesus oozing out all over the place in my interaction with and in regards to my kids.
Lord, you see all of the situations surrounding me. You alone are enthroned in heaven and yet that power is not untouchable. As you become more of my obsession I pray that you would help me as I walk this challenging road as a mom. Help me with the little moments and the big moments too. Most of all, help me to overcome the areas of weakness and stand tall in your strength. I give you praise and glory and honor for what you have done and are doing. I don't deserve your blessing and yet you give it in abundance. Thank you Lord, thank you. Help me to be a power-ful. A mom that so leans on your indwelling that I am lost and You are what people are left to see.
3 comments:
Amen, Amen, Amen - let these sincere requests be met in my sister, Lord! Love you - and I am SO excited for you!! (Hey - just now realizing - our babies will be exactly a year apart! If you have a girl, I can already hear my husband trying to arrange a marriage!)
I think, just the fact that your attitude is one of yearning to exude Jesus' love while you interact with your kids, shows that you are much closer to 'that power-ful mother' than you may realize. You are such an example and an inspiration to onlookers. Thank you for always being to genuine. That truly is powerful and effective! Love you! xoxo
I think, just the fact that you yearn to exude Jesus' love while you interact with your kids, proves you are much closer to that 'power-ful mother' than you may realize. You are such an example and inspiration to onlookers. Thank you for always being to genuine and honest, for this is what makes you truly effective among those you influence. Love you! xoxo
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