In a box

Moving is such a major ordeal. My sister moves every 3 years because her husband is in the military. I have a new level of respect for her. I told my husband that I had a great idea. We bought some of that plastic wrap for moving at a moving supply store. I told him that we should put everything that is left out in a big pile in the living room and run the plastic wrap around it several times. Then, when we move we can just pick up the big "left-over" and place it in the moving van. He wasn't amused.

I was shockingly saddened today as I put my pile of "skinny jeans" in a box to be moved. I actually thought that it might be better to just mark that box for Good Will. At the rate I am growing this pregnancy, I feel like I should just kiss those jeans good-by. They say that the weight gets harder to lose the more kids you have. I just rebuke those thoughts in Jesus name.
Let me just tell you that this girl gets a whole lot of junk in her trunk and more than one set of love handles. I lost my weight with my first due to stress, my second due to more stress. I am not planning on any major stress after this one which equals no easy weight loss.

As I sat in church tonight rejoicing and celebrating the resurrection of Christ, I began to think about my skinny jeans again. My whole identity I feel has been wrapped up in that box. I enjoy being fit and active and that has defined me most of my adult life. I realized that I put a tremendous amount of pressure on myself to be what I have always been.

I began to think, what if instead of just putting those jeans in a box, I put my identity tied up in them in that box as well. What if, for perhaps the first time, I began to see myself in light of the power that Jesus died to give me. What if, instead of just dabbing the love of God on like a perfume I just dove right in and covered myself there. Funny how in that scenario clothes don't really seem to matter.

God has blessed me with another child. I am overwhelmed with His goodness. I feel horrible for having thoughts of how I look right now. Ultimately it doesn't matter. I long to have my insides refined before that little one arrives. Perhaps a couple battles won or a couple bad habits overcome. I want to take care of body but my soul is far more important. I know Jesus isn't checking out my Jean size and He doesn't base His love on how I look and neither should I.

So long skinny jeans. We may meet again, we may not. One thing is for sure, I promise that you won't recognize me if we do meet again. I'm determined not to be the same girl I was 9 months prior.

I just fell in love with a new worship CD and one of the songs on it talks about each day with Jesus being sweeter than the day before. Lord, let it be so. Let me draw ever closer to you and empower me to enjoy our relationship more each day and fall deeper in love with your word each day. Define me Lord. Remove anything else from my life that vies for your place. You are what I desire most and in You is where I am to be found. I don't want to be known for my skinny jeans but for the aroma of Christ that overwhelms people. Let today be sweeter than tomorrow and tomorrow sweeter than today.